New Element in The Periodic Table

Hahahaha... so funny. Thanks Ms. HS for posting this on the Friendster bulletin board!

Element : WOMEN
Symbol : WO+
Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES
1. Boils at room temperature
2. Freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
5. Sweet as honey if given a proper treatment.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES
1. Have great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones and absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
2. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for unknown cause.
3. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increases by that.
4. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

TESTS
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.
2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD
Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come in direct contact with each other.

!! WARNING !!
PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS. BE CAUTIOUS!