Tuesday, September 26, 2006


Please remember me, darling...
Remember me and my existence
For I will become extinct very soon
Remember me...

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Study Abroad

I know I'm not a kid. And as a kid, I'm pretty sure I didn't ask to buy this and that a lot. Even though I asked, event though it was quite an expensive stuff, I never forced my parents to buy it. Once my parents said no, then I wouldn't ask anymore. When I live by myself now, and finance becomes my own problem, I even pay more attention to what I buy. Although a lot of times I want to buy some stuff, I can help myself to not think about it. I can limit myself to not spend so much. And so you could say I'm living in a low cost rate.

But then this time, it's a strong feeling. I really want it. It doesn't seem important for some people, and I also don't think it's extremely important to me. Maybe I would just waste my time and money, but all I could think of is the experience. I want the experience. I might not be able to adapt to the new environment easily, but I can admit I'm strongly drawn to go and study in other countries. Perhaps you could say right now I'm already studying abroad. Yes, I am, but I want more.

Though financially I might not be able to afford it, but what I regret and can't accept is the way people around me think about it. The way they think it's time and money wasting. The way they want me to graduate as fast as possible and as young as possible.

Maybe I'm just jealous over a friend, who has been studying abroad for more than 3 times in different countries; who has been to Japan, Latin America, North America, and so on and so forth. Maybe it's just a jealousy towards the way her family is rich enough to fund her to go anywhere; the way the people around her think that gaining experience is more important than a success in academic at such a young age; and the way everyone around her doesn't push her that far.

And now I think, what am I pushing myself very hard for? Why do I care to kill myself with 18 credits? And why am I concerned to get as best grades as possible? What for?

Again, maybe it's just a jealousy, or maybe it's how childish I am. But still, I'm disappointed with it.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

lessons from a movie

After watching The Break-Ups, I realized how much pride (a.k.a. gengsi) could harm our relationships with people. Hmmmm... Maybe I should learn from this as I could be considered as one who cares about pride so much.

The ending is not relly satisfying, but I recommend this movie to some guys out there! They need to learn that no matter how patient we -girls- are, our patience has its limit. Note that I didn't say all guys, but SOME guys; so if you think you're not included in that 'some' category, no offense alright?